Winter Wonderland

That is what I woke up to this morning. It was snowing very heavy and we quickly had about 2 inches on the cars. Going into work was a little slick at first but as the snow changed over to rain, it was a lot of slush on the road and just plain water. Thankfully the temperature stayed at 33 degrees.

Work has been a bit emotionally challenging lately. I've worked at my facility for almost 5 years. In the last several weeks several of the residents who were there when I started have really declined medically. Quite a few of them I have seen have setbacks and then go through rehab and then get better. But this time I suspect for many of them, this is drawing near the end. In my almost 5 years there, I have unfortunately seen many of the residents pass away. But some how this time it is different. Perhaps because they have been so strong for so long and now to watch them nearing the end is so heart breaking. Perhaps it is because I have worked on and off with them many times. Perhaps it is a reminder of my sweet cat Selah ((not comparing a cat to a human life) and watching her rebound again and again and this time she was not able to. Although it has been almost 4 months since she passed away, I still miss her very much.) Perhaps as I get older and have a parent who it older, it becomes all the more personal.

I was thinking the other day about Natalie being in school and how much of the day that her teachers spend with her and I was thinking about how much time I spend with my patients and how often I feel very protective of them. Because I have known many of them for years or even the new ones (I spend an intense hour of therapy with them each day for weeks to months) and often work with them on and off through the years I feel like they are a part of my family and I often know when something is just out of sync with them. So when they start to decline my heart does grieve and it is hard to watch. I have to often remind myself that for the time they were a part of my life, I helped to make their life a little bit better. For the twenty-five years that I have been doing this, there are many people who stand out in my mind and I don't think I will ever forget them.

There have been some other issues at work that have been very frustrating and that has made me rethink about what I am doing. But the bottom line is that I know God has given me a heart for the elderly and I know he has placed me where I am right now. So I hold fast to that and I remind myself of Colossians 3:23 "Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men."

Because in the realm of eternity it is what we do for the Lord that will remain and not what we do for man or ourselves.